December 31, 2012 by vlittle528
Sigh. Life lessons. When to teach them, how to teach them, and what lesson you are trying to teach is always challenging. And somehow the lesson always seems to hurt me far worse than they hurt my kids. Emotionally, financially or both-it sucks.
Today it happened to be the iPOD that Santa brought my son. According to him, he has been waiting for an iPod for YEARS! (Which is basically his whole life since he is only five!) He was good and admitted to me that he was doing something that he shouldn’t. Actually two things he shouldn’t. First of all, he was swinging his iPod while he was dancing to the music (something I have warned him about.) Secondly, he was dancing on the bed. Yep. The stitches aren’t even out of his sister’s head yet but apparently the “stern” rule of jumping/standing/dancing on the bed have already been forgotten. In any case, he came to tell me and ask me for my help. I initially said no-quite, after all, he lost it he should find it. But then I realized I wanted to reward him for telling me the truth so I spent an hour looking for the stupid and ridiculously small thing. Unfortunately looking also meant realizing how dusty my room was…I immediately thought this would be a good punishment for my son ;).
I finally gave up. Rather than continuing to look, my son said he would simply save his money and buy a new one. I told him I wouldn’t let him since he showed he was irresponsible with this one. So instead he decided to make a new Christmas list. On the top of that list was a new iPod. Wow.
I know in my heart that I will give in and buy him a new one if we don’t find it. But I struggled for a second with the decision of saying I was taking the money from his savings or telling him he had to wait for his birthday for it. Neither seemed adequate. I know a lesson that needs to be learned is that if you lose or break something you need to replace it yourself. However, my son seems to think this is a given. He even said “I will wait for next year if I have to.” He stopped looking and gave up. He doesn’t care tonight because 1. his sister offered hers to him and he knows he could probably use hers at anytime-which I told him was NOT going to happen but I am not always around, and 2. he doesn’t want it RIGHT NOW. He is still at the age where he isn’t thinking ahead. What to do?
Luckily my husband came home and found it in fifteen minutes (the butthead). In the closet. The kid must have been swinging the thing HARD. It went from the far side of my bedroom, magically missed the wall to the bathroom, went through the bathroom and landed on the clothes in the closet. I was smart enough to look in the toilet but not the closet. Go figure.
My husband was a smart cookie and handed the iPod to me. We won’t be giving it to my son for a few days, and we will be (meanly?) and subtly encouraging his sister to use hers. I am not going to give it back until I see some sort of remorse for losing it. I think lessons aren’t learned unless they are hard. Simply handing him back the iPod wouldn’t teach him anything other than mom and dad will find it and give it back and there are no consequences.
But man I would have been pissed if my husband hadn’t found it. And yes, I would have bought another. I am a sucker, I know. Bad mom of the year award right here. But in my defense…he really did wait all year for it.